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Fulfillment@Work: GETTING EVEN
October 7, 2001

Welcome to the Fulfillment@Work Newsletter
Published by Joel Garfinkle, Dream Job Coaching
ISSN: 1533-3906

Contents

1. Coaching Tip: Putdown Putoffs
2. Feature Article: Getting Even
3. Quotes of the Week

Coaching Tip
Putdown Putoffs

In this week's issue Joel reviews one of history's most destructive workplace relationships and the following five "corollaries" for improving your own personal relationships with critical co-workers and other unflattering individuals to help you make your interactions with others better instead of bitter:

  1. Be fully present for them by listening without judging.
  2. Treat your coworkers as equals.
  3. When all else fails, remember a person who reached out to you.

Feature Article

Getting Even

Sir Winston Churchill and Lady Astor could have benefited from heeding the advice of R.J. Rehwinkels who said, "The only people you should try to get even with are those who have helped you."

These two prominent British politicians experienced one of the bitterest relationships in Parliament history. Their interactions were constantly filled with conflict, sarcasm and caustic remarks, each intending to pay the other back in full for past transgressions.

Once during a legislative session, Lady Astor became so upset with one of Churchill's decisions she shouted, "Sir Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." To which Churchill quickly retorted, "Madam, if you were my wife, I'd drink it."

As Churchill and Astor's stormy working relationship demonstrates, many people have needlessly traded building up one another in favor of putting each other down. Even more evident in today's "dog eat dog" job market, positive, uplifting and encouraging words have been irresponsibly exchanged for negative, piercing and destructive ones, making my five "corollaries" for improving relationships with critical co-workers and other unflattering individuals even more timely:

  1. Accept and see others for who they are by looking for their positive strengths and talents, rather than their negative imperfections and shortcomings.

  2. Be fully present for them by listening without judging.

  3. Treat your coworkers as equals.

  4. Try viewing things from their perspective, instead of yours to better understand who they are, what they think and feel and why they behave like they do.

  5. When all else fails, remember a person who reached out to you.

Evaluate your relationships. Which direction have they taken? Be the first in your circle of family, friends or enemies to get even with only those who have helped you.

If you want to learn how to Find Your Dream Job, click here:
http://www.dreamjobcoaching.com/coaching-overview.html

If you want to learn about Executive Coaching, visit:
http://www.GarfinkleExecutiveCoaching.com

~ Joel Garfinkle
Dream Job Coaching:
Live Your Dream Life!

Quotes of the week

"It only takes one person to change your life - you."
~ Ruth Casey

"The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people, the hardest is with one."
~ Joan Baez

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."
~ Mark Twain

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Joel Garfinkle is available for coaching. Send him an email at joel@dreamjobcoach.com or call (510) 339-3201.

----------------------------

Copyright 1998-2006, Joel Garfinkle, all rights reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or distribute DreamsWork so long as this copyright notice and full information about contacting the author is attached.